Mickey D’s McMisfire

By Sean Zucker


Last week, McDonald’s joined the growing list of restaurant chains to offer plant-based items. The move follows a trend set by similar companies, like Burger King and Dunkin’, to provide healthier, more sustainable alternatives. Ever since 2004‘s Super Size Me, fast food chains, though especially McDonald’s, have faced pressure to rethink the ingredients they use and better represent how their products may affect/destroy human bodies. While it remains unclear whether these new options are actually any healthier than their meaty counterparts, the title of the storied franchise’s new item equally raises some questions. Its so-called groundbreaking plant-based burger set to soon grace American Mickey D’s menus has been dubbed simply “McPlant,” which sounds more like where the meatless patties are produced than the sandwich itself. After the news dropped, many Twitter folk understandably began immediately offering up more suitable meatless names, such as Big UnMac or McNotABurger. Personally, I’d go with the Hamburglar because the meat’s been stolen from it. But why stop there? In the spirit of rebranding, here’s a list of other products McDonald’s may want to consider renaming in its own unique way.

Fries – McPotatos

Big Macs – McMacs

Salads – McTrees

Ham Sandwiches – McPigs

Napkins – McPapers

Straws – McSucks

Toilets – McButtSucks

Toilet Paper – McBrownies

Vacuum Cleaners – McVrooms

Dogs – McRuffs

Cats – McMeows

Rolling Stones Singers – McMicks

Personal Computers – McMacs

Artists Behind 1990’s You Can’t Touch This – McHammers

White Rappers – McMacklemores

This List – McMakeItStop

 

 

 

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